The First Wizarding War: Of Love and Loss
by Batman Murdock Kent
Summary: Join the Marauders and their friends from their last year at Hogwarts, to their final battles with the Order of the Phoenix. Through their harrowing experiences, they all discover love, hope, and terrifying loss in the First Wizarding War against Voldemort. Focused most on Sirius Black, Marlene McKinnon, James Potter, and Lily Evans, but includes other Marauders and Order members.
1. A World Changed

The world was changing. As Marlene McKinnon walked briskly through the great gulf of grass that surrounded the Potter's ancestral home, she did not feel the familiar sense of happiness and anticipation that usually came with visiting her childhood friend. Gone were the days that she pined to get away from her overwhelmingly large family to the relative solitude of James Potter and his parents. Muggleborn witches and wizards were being targeted. People were dying. Marlene's family, supporting pro muggle legislation within the ministry, had been targeted as well. So, it was with quiet regret, and not the usually happy bounciness that usually accompanies her that Marlene knocked on the Potter family's door. Because this time she did not want to escape from her family, she wanted to be with them as they went into hiding. She wanted to make sure they were all safe, but she had to finish her last year of school, as such she had been told to stay with the Potter's until school began and to finish her final term at Hogwarts.

Her reverie was broken by a young man opening the door and smiling at her. James Potter was handsome in his own way, with a long nose and adorably round glasses, as well as perpetually messy hair. He smiled and hugged her.

"Hey Marls! It's good to see you." He might as well have said, "I'm glad you're still alive."

"James." She smiled too; glad to be distracted from her less than positive thoughts. James led her into the foyer, gesturing to several suitcases and a large trunk.

"You're stuff came in nice and orderly two days ago." He smiled, stuffing his hands into his pockets. Something was off, Marlene couldn't quite tell what it was, but she couldn't ignore it.

"Is everything alright James?" She asked as nonchalantly as she could, as she went over to check on her property that had been delivered previously.

"Of course," he gave a hollow smile, trying to project an air of confidence. He didn't want to scare her or bother her; he knew what she was going through.

"Then, why is it so quiet?" She asked, suddenly pinpointing what felt so strange. The Potter house, usually full with the sounds of laughter and a roaring fire was completely silent and cold. There was no fire, there we no joy in the house for what must have been the first time in decades. Then Marlene started to put the puzzle together, noticing the distinct lack of people as well.

"My parents are busy, with ministry stuff." James tried his best to avoid the truth. He was awful at lying, and Marlene instantly saw through him.

"What about Sirius?" Marlene and Sirius Black weren't the best of friends, but their mutual friendship with James meant they spent more time than would be normal with each other. But noticing his absence filled her with a strange sense of dread. He should have been with James at the door, making jokes, trying to be charming, and throwing his bark like laugh around the house. He had lived with the Potters since last summer, why was he not here?

Marlene's dread only deepened when she saw the mask of bravado fall from James's face. His head dropped and he mumbled something. Before she could ask what he had said he went to the kitchen. She followed him, asking him to repeat a question that was obviously painful, feeling slightly guilty in the process.

"What did you say?" She said, turning the corner into the kitchen. She found James sitting at the family dining room, fumbling with a golden snitch in his hands while trying to avoid her eyes.

He had to be brave, for her. "I said," he began, taking a deep breath. "Sirius left. He said there was something he had to do before we started school again. He wouldn't tell me where he was going, but I could tell something was wrong. When I woke up the next day, I found a note saying he would be back that night. That was three days ago." He choked out the last words. Marlene's chest tightened as the worst possibilities flooded into her mind.

"It's my fault, Mar," James said, as tears began to well into his eyes, "he's my best friend, I should have been there with him. And now, with the war and all…" he trailed off, not wanting to finish his thought. "Mum and Dad are out looking for him with the Aurors. I have to stay here. What if he's dead Mar?" He said, looking at her for comfort.

Marlene wasted no time. She dashed over to where he was sitting and hugged him. She was used to this. Though she was the youngest, she had always been the one to comfort her sister, Madeline, when her husband went out to find death eaters.

"He'll be fine James." She said trying to convince herself at the same time. "Now come on," she said gesturing him to get up. "It's freezing in this house, lets light a fire, start a cup of tea, and play a few rounds of exploding snap eh?"

"But, what about Sirius?" James asked. This had clearly been weighing on his mind for the last few days. Marlene couldn't make any promises that he would be fine, she felt almost sick thinking about the situation. She knew the only way to keep their sanity was to try and distract themselves.

"Well, what would Sirius want you to do right now? Worry about him, or try and beat me in a game of exploding snap?" She said, raising an eyebrow.

"He'd want me to beat you I guess." James said smiling.

"You bet he would." She said punching James in the arm. "The annoying git is probably just drunk somewhere with one of his many conquests anyway." She said, trying to cheer James up.

"Jealous of those conquests are you?" James smiled, getting his old confidence and sense of humor back. Marlene only wished his old self had not come back with such a stupid joke.

"Black doesn't date James. And if he did, I would want no part of it." She said simply, leading the way back to the living room. She sat down on the rug while lighting a fire with her wand.

"Whatever you say Mar." James laughed as he settled in front of her, preparing to win in their game. "But I've seen the looks you two have shared before. And I'm not the only one."

"Oh Merlin, it's Lily isn't it?" Marlene said pinching the bridge of her nose.

"I'm afraid so, and you know she won't quit." James said laughing at the dismay on Marlene's face.

"First you two get together, then she sets up Dorcas and Remus and now she thinks she's the official matchmaker of all Hogwarts." Marlene huffed.

"Still, he's not so bad," James began only to get cut off with a look from Marlene.

"You used to say I couldn't date anyone until I was thirty. What happened to that rule?"

"Well, Padfoot is good at breaking rules." James smiled, "and he's my best friend so he doesn't count."

"Well it's a good thing he doesn't date women, he just snogs and shags them, so I don't have to worry about him." Marlene added, suddenly feeling hot.

"That's just because he hasn't found one that doesn't bore him within an hour." James said, an amused smirk on his face at how defensive his friend had become.

"Whatever, are we going to play or not?" Marlene snapped, clearly wanting the discussion to end.

The sounds of James's laughter were soon drowned out by their heated game.

Hours later, Marlene was preparing for bed. She had packed all of her things, and had genuinely enjoyed her time with James. His mother and father came home long enough to check on them and hug Marlene with all the love they could muster. They were clearly exhausted, but when night fell they left again. This would be the third night that Sirius would be missing.

Marlene tried not to think about it as she brushed her curly blonde hair. She tried to think of anything else but her thoughts kept returning to Sirius. Her family had all stood up to Voldemort, so it was almost expected they would be targeted. But Sirius? Sure, he was vehemently anti-blood purity, but he was still only a student. He wasn't an auror or a famous muggleborn, he came from one of the most famous purblooded families in the wizarding world! Was this what the war was coming to, the abduction of students? Would Hogwarts even be safe? She briefly thought about Lily, who was muggleborn, and wondered if she was ok. She scratched out a brief letter explaining where she was and what had happened and asking if Lily was safe with her quill and parchment. After she attached it to her owl, she watched it fly off towards Lily's house. It frustrated Marlene that seemingly all she could do was send a letter. She wanted to bring her friend to a safe place.

She sighed and threw her brush onto her bed. This wasn't how life was supposed to be. This wasn't how the Potter's were supposed to be. And as she crawled into the sheets and tried to sleep, all she could think of was Sirius. She regretted not trying to get to know him better. She knew there was more behind his grey eyes than just a charming troublemaker. She had seen how loyal he was to his friends, and how eager he was to fight against blood purists and bullies. He took things too far sometimes, and he could be obnoxiously full of himself, but she had always wanted to understand him. And now, she may never get that opportunity again. She shook her head, willing away those oppressive thoughts, and tried to fall asleep.


	2. The Son Returns

Sirius Black writhed on the ground of the cold and tenebrous basement as the fire spread through his veins. The pain would not stop. The fire kept spreading. His voice had gone about an hour ago, so now only rasps came as he tried to yell the agony consumed him inch by horrifying inch. Eventually, it was too much, and he passed out for the third time that day.

"Aguamenti," he was awoken by a familiar voice and a jet of water hitting him straight in the face. "Do not for one moment think that you can hide within unconsciousness you bastard." The cold tone was covered in glacial hatred.

"Bastard?" Sirius managed to get out before vomiting beside where he lay. "You shouldn't speak," he tried to get up and face his assailant but stumbled back to the ground, "to your son that way." Sirius looked up from the stone ground, his usually lustrous dark hair matted with blood, to gaze with all the defiance he could muster at his attacker.

"You're no son of mine." The tall figure smirked back. He as a strange reflection of Sirius in appearance, similar black hair and handsome face, yet his face replaced the mirth and mischievous glint that Sirius possessed for an air of superiority and wickedness. "Crucio." The man whispered and he pointed his wand at Sirius. As Sirius began to howl hollowly with no voice and roll about in pain, the man smiled at his eldest son for the first time.

"Orion!" A nervous shriek echoed down to the basement of 12 Grimmauld Place. "There are ministry aurors here! They're asking about the blood traitor." Walburga black refused to call Sirius by his name anymore, now only referring to him as "blood traitor".

"Very well." Orion said simply, "We shall pick up from here after I deal with this nuisance." He seemed honestly annoyed that he was interrupted from torturing his child. Sirius, for his part, merely lay there, trying not to black out again. He barely heard his fathers footsteps disappear upstairs. He tried to drag himself away, but between the constant pain he felt from the curses, and the lack of food he had been given, he was too weak.

"Well," he thought to himself, "I always did say my family would be the death of me." At this point he just wished they would get on with it. At first they tortured him, asking why he had come back and if he was with the order. Black didn't even know what order they were talking about. After it was apparent he knew nothing about any order, they tortured him just for fun, or for revenge for betraying the family, or just because they were so bloody evil. It didn't matter to him, he was too weak to fight or run. He just hoped they would kill him soon.

Sirius was distracted by a sudden crack that came from his side. The ancient looking house elf Kreacher stood next to him, no doubt to gloat. Sirius would usually berate him, once he got his breath back, he may try and command the house elf to kill him, if for no other reason that to deny his father or mother the pleasure. Yet the elf did not speak to him at all. It just kept muttering to himself.

"Must do as master commanded. Yet master commanded Kracher to be silent. Must obey master, but must stay silent. Must help master Sirius. Kreacher wants Sirius to die though. But Kreacher must." Finally, after his emotional battle with himself seemed to be over, Kreacher did the unimaginable. He took out Sirius's wand and dropped it next to him before another sudden loud crack saw him disappear.

Sirius couldn't believe his luck. He couldn't believe any of this. Part of him thought he was dying and that this was just a final happy hallucination before the end. Yet, with an outstretched hand he held his wand, and it felt real enough. For the first time in two days, Sirius felt a flame of hope erupt in his heart. He had to act quickly. He healed as many of his cuts and wounds as he could, knowing he would need every once of strength to make a break for it and disapparate once he was outside.

After finally feeling strong enough, he clamped his wand between his teeth and prayed that his terrible excuse for a plan would work. Slowly, he crawled on to his hands and knees, and began to change. His face elongated, his black hair seemed to spread around his entire body until he was no longer a young man but a massive black dog. With his wand in his mouth he bolted up the stairs. To his horror, his mother was in the kitchen, using the cruciatis curse of Kreacher to punish him for abandoning his post. When she turned to see the black dog, she immediately raised her wand to kill it, having now idea her son was an animagus.

Sirius did the only thing he could, he jumped through the nearest window, cutting himself deeply in several places and hurting his front paw as he landed. The pain was so much he transformed back into a human, laying on the ground and holding his right wrist where it had broken. Before his mother or father could chase him, he thought of the only safe place he had ever known. The world seemed to spin around him, and the stone sidewalk from behind their house gave way to grass. He struggled to get up; taking his wand from his mouth, knowing it was only a matter of time before his family followed him. He had to get inside. He was losing blood from his cuts; he couldn't call for help because his voice was gone. Instead he just limped toward the front door.

He reached the door and banged on it with all the strength he could muster, leaving bloody handprints with each bang. That is when he heard the loud bang noise from behind him. Sirius turned, leaning his back against the door to support himself, to face his father.

"How did you get your wand back?" His father asked seemingly calmly but with the familiar icy hate that usually followed his words.

"Ask me no questions, I'll tell you no lies." Sirius managed to rasp out. He doubted his father could even hear it.

"Stupefy!" his father yelled as a jet of red light came from his wand straight toward Sirius.

"Protego!" Sirius responded, shielding himself from the red jet and making it deflect away with a loud crack of light.

"I will kill you." His father stated, almost as easily as he was telling someone the weather, like it wasn't his son he was threatening to kill. "You cannot win. Just lay down your wand and save us all the trouble."

"Since," Sirius gasped for air, he was having difficulty standing and was in no condition to duel. "Since when have I ever obeyed your orders?"

Sirius barely managed to move out of the way of a stream of green light. It destroyed the door behind him, and he was left sprawled on the ground. His wand was about ten feet away, he tried to crawl toward it, but when he finally reached it, his father stepped on top of it. Sirius looked up at the cold unflinching stare of his father.

"Avada-" he began, only to be cut off and flung back by a streak of red light that had come seemingly from nowhere. Sirius didn't have the strength to turn and see his rescuer. He merely grabbed his wand, and collapsed back to the ground after trying to stand again.


	3. A Hand to Hold

Marlene hadn't been able to sleep. Despite the quiet that the Potter home provided her mind drifted too easily into horrible scenarios that no one should have to think of. She worried for her friends, her family, even herself. She had so wanted to come to the Potter's and just forget about everything, but the world had intruded into this safe place.

As she thought, she heard a strange sound come from outside. At she glanced at the window from her bed, thinking maybe Lily had just written a simple and incredibly fast reply to her letter earlier. But there was no owl at the window. Then three loud bangs came from the front door a floor below her. She immediately sat up in her bed to listen to what happened next. She heard James's door open and he immediately knocked on hers.

"Mar? Did you hear that?" He asked.

"Yes," she replied sliding out of bed and putting on some sweat pants to go along with her old t-shirt that she usually wore to bed. She grabbed her wand and opened the door. James was standing there with his wand too in his pajamas.

"Who do you think is at the door?" she asked, somewhat apprehensively.

Before James could answer her question and tell her he had already contacted his parents and they were on the way, a loud crack accompanied by a boom echoed through the enormous house. They both sprinted down the stairs to see the front door blown apart completely. When they reached the front yard, they saw a man in black clothes standing over a broken, bloodied, and half dead body. They same him raise his hand when they both pointed their wand at him.

"Expelliarmus!" James yelled.

"Stupefy!" Marlene cried at the same time. Two jets of red collided with the man in black, sending him flying backwards. They both ran toward whomever it was he was standing over. He tried to stand but fell back down to the first and grass.

"Help him, I'll hold him off!" James shouted as Marlene ran toward the figure. She knelt down and rolled him over. She involuntarily gasped when she realized both that the body was Sirius, and that he seemed dead.

She couldn't move him, not like this. He was too badly hurt and bleeding, if she moved him too much he may die before they get him back inside. Marlene did the only thing she could think of, which was begin to heal his lacerations and keep him alive, if he was still alive. While she began to mutter healing spells and wave her wand over his skin, she could see it slowly beginning to pull back together. The blood began to clot, the river of red stopped dripping off of him and onto the green grass.

James had no idea what was happening. He did not know that his best friend was dying right behind him. All he knew was that he had to keep this man busy long enough for his parents to come back. He began to launch spell after spell at the man, who was at first so overwhelmed from the first attack he could not mount an appropriate response. With every second though, the tall man in black regained his composure, and went from merely blocking the spells to batting them away with ease.

He began to advance on James, still deflecting his spells with simple flicks of his wrist. He then slashed at James' legs horizontally. As he slashed, a dark whip extended from the tip of his wand, binding James' legs together. With a tug, James was knocked to the ground. At this point, the older man passed his wand in front of his face, from thin air a skull mask appeared on his face. The man circled around to James, and put his boot on James's throat.

"You're out of your league boy."

At that moment, five wizards apparated all around the older man. They each had their wands pointed at him. Two of the faces were immediately familiar to the children; Harold and Elizabeth Potter were with the three other aurors that had arrived. With a snarl, the man dissapparated into a wraith like creature made seemingly made of smoke and disappeared.

"Follow him!" Bellowed Harold Potter as he ran toward James. James got up and yelled to his father that he was all right. Him and his father then turned and ran toward his mother, who was now kneeling next to the body on the ground opposite Marlene. As James got closer, he recognized the long hair, the tall body and once happy looking face. Revulsion, guilt, and a particular sickness hit him all at once as he saw his best friend bloodied and broken lying in the dirt.

"Harold, fix the door and put up more protective charms on the house. James go with him he'll need help."

"Will he be alright mum?" James choked out, ignoring her orders.

"Come along son. Best to let your mother and Marlene take care of him." Harold put a protective arm around his son and marched him to the door.

"Marlene, you've done beautifully." Elizabeth Potter stated with a faint smile. "He could have died if you didn't do what you did. But he still needs many of his wounds healed or he'll be disfigured or paralyzed. Help me get him to a room.

Marlene was in shock, she was totally drained physically and mentally, all she could do we help Mrs. Potter levitate Sirius to a bedroom inside. While moving inside, she saw Harold Potter casting protego maxima around the house and then going to reconstruct the front door. James tried to help his father, but he was in shock too.

The rest of the night and next day passed in a blur. Mrs. Potter was up all night crafting healing potions and spells over Sirius as he laid motionless in bed. Marlene tried to help, but she was out of her depth when it came to healing more complicated wounds. Eventually, all she could do was pull a chair up and old his hand, or try and clean blood out of his hair or off of his face. She stayed by his side the whole night and day, scared that if she left he would be taken again. She never realized how terrified she was that Sirius Black might be gone from her life. The realization brought more significant thoughts to her, but she was too busy worrying if he would live or wake up to worry about those now.

James joined her in her vigil of course, but he would patrol around the house with his father also, so that just left her and Sirius alone for some hours of the day. When she became too tired, she fell asleep in her chair next to him, still holding his hand. She didn't know why she was so worried, after learning of the attacks the Ministry had sent two aurors to guard the house. But leaving him felt impossible.

She awoke to feeling in her hand; it was subtle at first, but enough to set off some strange alarm in her head. She woke to find him squeezing her hand, it wasn't much, but it was the first sign of life that he had shown since he first appeared back at the Potter home.

She squeezed back, "it's ok Sirius, I'm here with you." She knew he probably couldn't hear her, but she wanted him to know that someone was there with him. She could never be sure, but she thought she heard him mumble something. Soon after he fell back to his comatose sleep however, leaving her with just her thoughts again. She too, fell asleep quickly after.

The next day, after resting for almost a full day, Sirius finally woke up with Marlene still next to him. She called for Mrs. Potter immediately, while trying to hold Sirius back. He was trying to fight against something, still thinking he was back at 12 Grimmauld Place, still thinking his life was in danger. He was so weak it was relatively easy for Marlene to pin him to the bed, despite him being taller and stronger than her usually. He was just so weak, it hurt Marlene to see the mythically invulnerable and confident Sirius so beaten down.

When Mrs. Potter ran in, she asked Marlene to leave for the first time since she had been there. Marlene didn't want to leave, but she didn't feel like she had a choice. Sirius needed more capable hands than hers. As she left, she could hear Mrs. Potter telling Sirius what had happened, though he was clearly still out of it. She kept trying to tell him that he was safe, that he needed to be still and heal. All Marlene could make out from Sirius was something like, "I won't let you" over and over again. Between his injuries and his almost complete lack of voice, it broke her heart to see him so helpless.

She made her way down the stairs to the kitchen. She wanted to rest but she wanted something to drink first. When she made it downstairs, she could see two people sitting in front of the fireplace. James had his head in Lily's lap while she tried to calm him down. It was obvious that he had been crying, and it was no wonder why. His best friend was almost taken from him. Lily had come immediately when she received Marlene's letter and then one from James explaining what had happened. Remus and Peter were both told to stay with their families for a few weeks until things calmed down. Lily and Marlene were all James had. Going to the kitchen, Marlene grabbed three butterbeers and made her way back to the living room. She silently gave one to Lily and James, who took them gladly. The three of them then sat there in silence, listening to the fire, and to the cries of Sirius upstairs. There was nothing for them to say to one another, they just needed to be around each other for now. Eventually, Sirius's muffled cries from upstairs stopped, leaving them in agonizingly deafening silence.


	4. Tea and Honey

Marlene was always amazed at how under even extraordinary circumstances things can become routine. In the weeks after "the attack" as it came to be known, everyone in the Potter house soon fell into a predictable pattern. What was strange, Marlene thought as she dried herself after getting out of the shower, was what the routines became. One would imagine that James would constantly be by Sirius's side and that he would constantly want to be near his best friend, and that Lily and Marlene would distract themselves until Sirius was mended well enough to join them all. What happened though was something very different.

Marlene's brow stayed furrowed in concentration as she dressed in a simple tank top and Holyhead Harpies sweatpants. As she walked downstairs, she tried to tame her tangled curly hair into a ponytail. When she reached the kitchen, she saw Lily enjoying a cup of tea at the table, seemingly lost in thought.

"Hey Lils."

"Oh, hey Mar." Lily snapped her head over to look at her friend, losing her train of thought.

"Tea still warm?"

"Yeah, help yourself, honey is on the table."

Marlene's eyes sparkled as she helped herself to the honey, sweetening her tea with it. Lily grinned at her friend's weakness for anything sweet. Yet, even while she enjoyed the simple presence of Marlene, it wasn't enough to completely set her at ease.

"Has James been to visit him yet?" Lily asked tepidly.

Marlene merely shook her head in reply.

"Merlin, what's going on? You'd think…I don't know." Lily rubbed her temples in confusion, her crimson hair threatening to fall in her eyes as she did so. "A month ago they were tied at the hip and now Sirius almost dies and he won't even see him."

"Yeah, Sirius has been asking about him." Marlene put her cup of tea down and folded her hands in front of her. "He thinks he made James mad or something. I haven't been able to get anything out of him though, not really."

"Yeah, James has been silent whenever I bring him up to. I think he blames himself for what happened." Lily thought out loud, "Do you think they had a row and that is what set Padfoot off?"

Marlene arched an eyebrow; it was amazing how Lily had embraced James and his friends once they showed they were maturing. First it was letting James actually take her on a date, now she was comfortable using their nicknames. If they weren't talking about such a serious topic she would have smiled at the transformation of Lily Evans.

"There is almost nothing in this world that would make Sirius go back to his blood family." Marlene said confidently. "I have no idea what happened beforehand, but I know it's probably driving both him and James up the wall."

"And as ever, it falls to the women in their lives to save them from themselves." Lily said with a sigh, looking at Marlene knowingly.

Marlene diplomatically passed over the implication Lily threw out, instead just nodding her head and agreeing with her.

"It has been nice though, in a way, spending all this time with James. We only ever went on one date before school was over, when he proved he wasn't a complete idiot." She smiled, "so this is nice, just taking things slowly. I just wish he would come clean about Sirius. How is he by the way?"

Marlene smiled despite herself; "he's getting back to his normal egotistical self. You know how he is Lily. He puts on this act of constantly making jokes and flirting and being in control. But, every once in a while I find him looking at me weirdly."

"What do you mean?" Lily leaned closer to Marlene across the table, fighting back a smile.

"Well, It's hard to describe." Marlene could feel a strange tightening feeling in her chest that she had begun to associate with Sirius for some reason. "You know how he usually looks and talks to me, he would treat me like he does you or Peter or anyone else right?"

Lily nodded her head enthusiastically, desperate to hear all of the delicious details.

"Well he acts really normal when he's around us or his friends right? Like he'll joke around but he'll kind of drop the dramatic stuff and be more down to earth around us yeah? Well, more down to earth for Sirius at least."

Again Lily nodded her head up and down and motioned with her hand for Marlene to go on.

"Every now and again, when I'm with him, I'll find him looking at me in a strange way, or he'll say something strange. Like, he'll actually be vulnerable Lils. And I've never seen him that way."

"So, what does he say, what does his looks look like?" Lily asked eagerly, already creating a plan in her head.

"Well you know that we have, um, had a bit of a past." Marlene suddenly blushed a little.

"Yeah you snogged a few times last year before you broke it off. You said he wasn't ready." Lily replied matter-of-factly.

"Yeah well, when we did that, all I could see was lust in his eyes you know? But now, he just looks at me differently. Like, I'm important or something. And then the other day, when I turned to leave and get the potions he needs, he grabbed my hand, and asked where I was going. He sounded concerned almost, and when I told him what I was doing, he apologized, mumbled something, and then thanked me. You should have seen it Lily, I wish I had a camera, I would frame the picture and call it, "The First Time Sirius Black Ever Showed Sincere Gratitude."

A familiar smile began to spread over the face of Lily Evans. Marlene saw it grow, slowly at first, until it spread across her entire heart shaped face.

"Lilsy. Don't." Marlene commanded, staring with all the intensity she could manage while feeling a blush try and sneak into her cheeks.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Lily suddenly feigned ignorance.

"You are not going to try and set Sirius and I up this year, do you understand?" Marlene pointed an accusing finger at Lily.

Lily for her part scooted back in her chair and raised both hands defensively. "I would never do that."

"Never do what?" James asked as he came into the kitchen. He was still half asleep and his hair was even messier than it normally was.

"Nothing." Marlene squeaked out before taking a quick swig from her tea.

"Just girl talk, we were talking about going to.." Lily trailed off.

"Diagon alley for some new dress robes. For the Yule Ball they are having this year." Marlene finished for her; Merlin Lily was awful at lying.

"Oh, well that sounds nice." James uttered sleepily. Marlene thanked her lucky stars that he was so tired, usually a lie that forced wouldn't fool James.

"Well if you're up that probably means Siri is too." Marlene said, getting up. "I'd better go check on him."

Lily only smiled at the use of a cute nickname like that while James seemed to be visibly pained by being reminded of his best friend.

"Mom said that her and dad would be back this weekend so, she can take care of him not you." James said uncomfortably.

"No it's fine, I'm actually beginning to like spending time with the cocky git." She walked over to him, gave him a hug, and walked behind Lily to give her one as well.

"Find out what is going on with James, and I'll find out from Sirius. You good with that?"

Lily didn't respond only nodded with a small almost silent giggle. And with that, Marlene disappeared up the stairs to Sirius's room.


	5. A Conversation on the Roof

Marlene knocked gently on the wooden door to Sirius's room. She waited patiently for his familiar voice to tell her dramatically to, "enter" in his confident voice. She could swear she could hear the smirk in his voice. Slowly the seconds passed by as she waited as patiently as she could.

"Sirius?" She knocked again. There was still no answer. Despite herself Marlene began to get worried. She pulled her wand out of the pocket of her sweatpants and opened the door. Marlene didn't understand the scene she was faced with. The room was much as she had seen it yesterday, a few of Sirius's t-shirts were scattered on the floor, as well as some of his blue jeans. The adjacent door to an attached bathroom was open, revealing a drying towel thrown haphazardly in the sink. The bed was messy, and the desk across from the bed was covered in parchment and books. Everything seemed normal except for two things, the window was open, and Sirius was gone.

Marlene's heart hammered in her chest and she ran over to the open window. There was no way anyone could have gotten in here, Mrs. Potter enchanted that window so it couldn't be opened from the outside. The window curtains blew lazily in the wind, almost mocking Marlene's alarm with their relaxed movements. Not knowing what else to do, Marlene stuck her head and upper body through the window, looking for any outside influence that could have taken Sirius.

"Oh, hello Marls." A familiar voice said above her. When Marlene turned awkwardly to face the voice, she was too relieved to be furious.

"Sirius?" She said both relieved and confused. "What are you doing?"

Sirius was sitting on the slanted roof, lounging with the same natural savoir-faire he would have in the Gryffindor common room. He was shirtless, with his bandages covering some of his wounds, actually the only part of him that was clothed at all were his legs, which were covered in black pajama bottoms. His wand was sticking out of his waistband, and he smirked down at Marlene, delighted to see her so perplexed.

"I'm enjoying the view. Care to join me." He said, patting his hand on a spot of the roof next to him.

"How did you, why…oh Merlin." Marlene muttered to herself as she climbed out the window. The roof was actually easy to climb to her surprise; the roof seemed to stick to her hands and feet as she climbed toward Sirius. When she got next to him she sat down and felt rooted in place, despite being at a precarious angle.

"What did you do to the roof?" She asked, looking out at the stunning view afforded to her.

"I have a talent for transfirguration," he said simply, patting his wand, "It was pretty easy to make this part of the roof fairly safe for a quick escape."

"Well you almost gave me a heart attack!" Marlene shouted at him, remembering her anger. She slapped him on his left shoulder, one of the only areas that got out of his abduction and escape unharmed.

"Ow! Hey, what was that for?"

"For making me worried! You can't just go off and disappear without telling anyone! Especially when you're still on the mend!" She slapped him another time for emphasis before crossing her arms and facing forward again.

"Merlin, Marls I'm sorry." Sirius muttered rubbing his shoulder, "I just, needed to leave that bloody room. I feel like I'm a prisoner in there."

"What if something had happened to you though? You're still healing." Marlene's voice went from angry to more understanding. With as naturally energetic as Sirius was, she could understand him feeling restless. "You have to be careful Sirius."

"I know." He said, looking off in the distance. "You know you're fairly cute when you've calmed down and aren't slapping me Mckinnon." He turned to grin at her.

"So I'm ugly when I'm angry huh?" Marlene retorted, getting ready to slap him again. But as she raised her hand he grabbed her wrist.

"No, you're sexy as hell." He said pinning her blue eyes with his gray. Marlene felt the tightening in her chest; her heart began to beat faster and faster. She honestly didn't have a response prepared for this. She tore her hand free instead and looked away.

"You really need to stop acting like that." She said.

"Oh really? Why's that?" Sirius asked with an amused smirk on his face.

"Because I'm not one of the skirts in your fan club back at school Black. I have standards that are actually higher than some of my high heels, unlike you."

"As I recall I'm not the only one with a fan club." Sirius drawled out, "you have had quite a few conquests as well. Just because you haven't been labeled as heart breaker as I have, doesn't mean you don't deserve the label."

Marlene was shocked. "Are you calling me a slut?" She had a hand on her wand, she was about to hex this idiot to Gringotts and back, hurt or not.

"Merlin no!" Sirius exclaimed. He seemed almost hurt that she had accused him of that. "I'm just saying that, well, we're not so dissimilar." He said defensively. He quickly added, "and for your information all of those girls in my "fan club" are incredibly boring. I'm not even going to bother with them this year."

"Oh." Marlene said, somewhat taken aback. This was a very strange morning, she thought to herself. She honestly didn't know what to say about any of this. Sirius was such a strange person; she just couldn't understand him sometimes.

"Beautiful view isn't it?" Sirius asked her, looking at her for a response.

"Yes it is, makes climbing up here seem less suicidal than it would normally." She said sarcastically.

"What's life without a little risk Marls?" Sirius said while leaning back against the roof with his arms folded behind his head. He closed his eyes and relaxed. Marlene could see all of his muscles, and his scars, displayed wonderfully in the morning sun. He looked so comfortable. It didn't take her long to mimic his position, laying down next to him on the roof, looking at the sky as it shifted from pink and yellow to blue. She inched closer to him; just feeling like it was the right thing to do as she closed her eyes as well. She let a comfortable silence envelope them. Sirius frustrated her, but she felt so comfortable around him, and she loved small intimate moments like this that she spent with him.

"Sirius?" she said, propping her head up with her hand. All she got as a reply was a grunt. She rolled her eyes and poked him in the stomach which got her a proper reply.

"Yes?" He asked, noticing how close she was. He scooted closer to her and rested his head against the back of the roof almost under her face.

"Why did you go back?" She looked concerned. She hadn't bothered asking him, she didn't want to be nosy or bother him while he was healing. But she needed to know. She felt like she had earned this trust.

"Figured I'd show those idiots what a real wizard looks like." He said with a smirk, winking at her in the process.

"Sirius, come on." She said softly. She lowered her head closer to his, resting her head on her arms next to him while lying on her side opposite him. It was usually this way, she had discovered, first a sarcastic or swaggering answer before you got to the truth.

Sirius sighed, before rolling on his side and facing her. "This stays between us. You swear?"

"I swear." She answered with a small smile.

"It was Reg. I thought that, that I could convince him to come here with me you know? It's just, I see who he's hanging out with at school. If he stays in with those Slytherin idiots he'll be a death eater before he even leaves Hogwarts. I thought, that, well, maybe I could convince him there's a better way, before those junior death eaters really got their hooks in him."

Marlene hadn't expected this. He sounded so caring, so worried. She had rarely, if ever, heard Sirius talk about his younger brother. He had all sorts of swears and curses to heap upon the rest of his family, but he never spoke of his brother. Without meaning to, Marlene began to move her hand up and down his arm, trying to comfort him. He looked heartbroken.

"What happened?"

Sirius didn't want to look her in the eyes. When he finally did they were misted over. "He said it was too late, that I was wasting my time. I told him that he was still my brother, and I knew he couldn't believe all of that pure blood nonsense that had been forced on him. Well, I guess he proved me wrong when my father came into his room. I raised my wand to defend myself and he disarmed me."

"Merlin Sirius, I'm so sorry." He snaked an arm around her waste and pulled her forward, which she accepted without a second thought. He ended up with his face buried in the crook of her neck just holding on to her while she rubbed his back and stroked his hair. It felt strangely natural to Marlene to be like this with him.

Finally breaking away from her, he turned over to lie on his back again. He still kept an arm wrapped possessively around the small of her back, keeping her next to him.

"No one should have to be afraid of their family. You deserve better Sirius."

"Correction Marls." He looked over at her. "One, I am not scared of them at all. Hatred and fear are very different emotions. Two, they aren't my family. We just happen to share the same last name."

Marlene smiled at him, before crawling closer to him and leaning her head onto his chest. His arm laid on top of her, drawing lazy circles over her exposed arm and lower back.

"We need to leave soon and go back in your room. We need to change your bandages and you need to take your potions." Marlene hummed into his chest. As much as she hated it, she didn't want to move. She wanted to stay like this, just the two of them, with no need for words or anyone or anything. She just wanted to hold on to him and forget about the war, or death eaters or even Hogwarts.

"I know." He replied simply, the words rumbling in his chest. Marlene knew he didn't mean to let it slip out, but he sounded disappointed to return back inside.

"We can stay like this a little longer." She said, blushing at just how close and intimate they were. She thanked Merlin all Sirius could see was the top of her head and not her face.

"In that case I'll enjoy every moment." Sirius replied.


End file.
